Tonight, as I sit here, eager to blog after a much needed break, I am not sure how it will pour out. It's been over a month since I last wrote. My kids and I were moving into a new home, so in the nooks and crannies of being a busy, single career mom, I only gave myself a month to pack up a 2500 sq. ft house...(In hind sight? probably should have given myself more time.)
Needless to say, I was burned out, and feeling a bit overwhelmed in some areas of life, so I decided to take some "quiet" time for myself. Sometimes, in order to find balance, I temporarily remove things from this often overflowing plate. Unfortunately, my blog is one of those things that I don't "HAVE" to do. It's more of what I enjoy doing; that favorite hobby that even though I prefer not to, I can and must put on the back burner once in a while. I love to inspire you and quite honestly, it's very therapeutic for me to do so. I appreciate you reading and sharing... I want you to know that.
Taking that break was a great idea after all. I am starting to feel alive again, and even in the imperfect moments, I push through. Finding the bright side is truly second nature to me at this point. I have heaved enough hurdles, swallowed enough disappointments and overcome enough obstacles to last a lifetime... (and it actually feels like they have lasted that long.)
NOW THAT THE DUST HAS SETTLED
After getting settled into the new home last week, I was able to attend my new church for the first time, and attended again today. After an INCREDIBLE two weeks of worship and amazing messages, I was moved to get back to writing, (now that I am out of cardboard hell.)
In this season of life, I find that every message I hear gets closer and closer to my heart and know that it is certainly more than coincidence. I feel God himself is speaking to me, telling me what I need to hear like a soft whisper. It is very comforting, and makes me feel so well taken care of as I continue to pray upon a few areas of life that I just can't seem to get right.
As I travel down a completely new road of life, I am feeling a spiritual need to dig further into the depths of my past... my present, and hopes for my future. I felt the need to write down lessons that I have learned, am learning now and ones I feel I still need to learn. I felt it would help me remind myself how far I have come, where I am now and to get more excited about where I hope to go. Perspective is everything, and often even though we are moving forward, it feels instead like we are treading water as we go after something.
STOPPING TO SOAK IT IN
If we don't stop and breathe for a bit, to reflect and plan ahead, we will end up getting lost in our travels. Tomorrow (August 19th) marks what would have been my oldest sister's 51st birthday if she were still here. It was my first official day back to the grind since the move so I have declared it the first day of the rest of my life in her honor.
I refuse to make the same mistakes anymore, I promise myself to stay true to my values, morals, ethics and goals. I will expect more and stop accepting less than what I am worth. I will choose to limit my time spent to those who show the desire to spend time with me. Chasing dreams is fun and exciting, chasing people, not so much.
It's amazing what you realize when you are truly honest with yourself... what happens when you sit with pen and paper and write down your mistakes and decisions and how they affected your life. It gives you clarity and helps you realize exactly what NOT to do again and exactly what to do in order to fix it, to change it. Everything good begins with change.
DON'T GIVE UP, TAKE A CHANCE
Are you TRULY happy in all aspects of your life right now? If you are, then job well done, you better cherish that! If not, what can YOU do to change your position? What is it that holds you back? What cycles are you repeating that keep you in a vicious circle of what you don't want? Are you taking chances or staying safe?
For some, taking chances is all they have ever done... (ahem, me) and for others, chances are what they have never taken and wonder why they stand still. Safety nets may catch you when you fall, but the exciting part is being shot out of the canon... the feeling you get while you are flying cannot be described nor duplicated.
MY HAPPY ENDING AWAITS... SO DOES YOURS
The 3 year anniversary of my book releasing on Amazon is October 20th... just a couple of days away. I plan to write a few hours each night until my next book is complete starting that day. I did it once, I can do it again. Focus... dedication and perseverance will get me to that "Happy Ending" that I so desire. The blessing lies in being happy while I go after it.
One day... I will be married to the man God wants me to have, or live happily in the fact of never marrying for the reasons I should have had. I will live the abundant life He promises, I will reach all my goals and LIVE OUT my dreams... because that is what being faithful means; believing that your "Happy Ending" is there even when it's not able to be seen yet.
Are you waiting for yours? Is it right in front of you or in the far far distance? It is up to you to not let it pass you by, pay attention, pursue it, GO AFTER IT and once you have it, NEVER let it go.
Until next time....
PURSUE WHAT YOU HOPE FOR; LEAVE BEHIND WHAT YOU WISH TO FORGET....
and for that ONE special person that I know God is creating for me...
I can't wait to live this life with you
I HOPE THAT YOU WILL:
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