It's Not the Speed of the Train.... It's Patience

One of the most difficult traits to deal with as an action-driven entrepreneur is often impatience. The reason we often lack this trait is not because we are naturally an impatient person, but rather, we typically put everything on the line to go after a goal, a business venture, a dream we have; leaving little room for error, even when we KNOW we will make some mistakes if we are going to succeed. Sound familiar? Yeah, me too... so remember this....

It's not the speed of the train... it's the strength of the engine and the patience it has to get back on track once it veers off. ©shelleygiard

If there is one thing I have learned by now, it is how to be patient in business... (now only if it would rub off on my parenting when my kiddos don't listen!) Going after a goal can bring out almost every emotion in you, but patience is not typically one of them. Let's go through the emotions of going after a goal. I will give you a cliff note explanation of  each stage and give you some tips on how to get through them. In order to get beyond the negative emotions that stir in us, you must know what to do when you are in the midst of each one.

EXCITEMENT (the hot phase)
When you first set a goal or think of an idea, you get excited. Like REEEALLLLY excited! You start envisioning how amazing it is all going to come together and often have that "nothing is going to stop me" attitude. This is perfect... for that hot phase, it is the only thing that is going to drive you into action. This excitement phase sets your motivation; we ALL have a reason for setting the goal. It takes excitement to drive the actions that will get us moving! Don't simply stay here and fizzle out as some do; allow this phase to drive you into your passionate phase...


PASSION (the planning phase)
Passion is what drives us into action, it is what makes us feel alive and gives us the energy to push into focus. Focus is what then forces us to map out a plan to reach our goal. We must stay here and hang out a while but not allow the excitement to dwindle; it all kind of goes together. These are the fun times... enjoy them because they don't last forever... but I promise you will NEED THEM as reminders later on of why you started to begin with, You will find them again, but with different meaning.


AMBITION (the action phase)
This is where all the action happens... your excitement is still there, passion has made you focus and plan, now ambition will cause the actions to make it happen. This is your first long phase, get comfy... put on your slippers and grab some coffee. You will spend a lot of your energy here and likely lose some excitement along the way, but it plays a huge part, so hang tough. Most people begin to quit in their subconscious mind here... DON'T QUIT!

DOUBT (the cooling off phase)
Drive, hard work, and dedication were all strong and steadfast in the ambitious phase, but because that is not the phase where the magic usually happens, doubt begins to set in. Oh.. the doubt. The doubt in your idea, your goals, dreams, reasoning, abilities and well... everything else you can think up that will stop you from pushing through this phase. It's a HARD ONE! Your excitement was used up in the last three phases, so now you are starting to get a bit frustrated... you are beginning to believe what everyone is saying about giving up. It's a crappy phase but PUSH THROUGH!!!!! I promise it is worth it.

FEAR (the "what if" phase)
Doubt has set in and fear is the best friend that comes without an invite. Yep... you now fear that everything you did was a huge mistake. Whatever you have put on the line is going to be gone and you will never recover; the "I did all of this for nothing" attitude is taking over. Well... if you allow that attitude to hand around, that may be exactly what happens, but when in this phase you must remind yourself of your passion and how excited you were at one time. Fear is an emotion that you can overcome.

FEAR is what False Emotions Always Reveal. ©shelley giard
Keep pushing, YOU CAN DO IT!!! Don't let fear stop you.... it is part of the process.

ANGER (the decision phase)
If you doubt yourself and fear that you are not good enough to achieve what you hope for, you will end up here. If you are pushing through the doubts of others and have fears of failure, you will end up here as well. The outcome of this phase will all depend on which of the above you are feeling. When it all boils down, belief in yourself  and getting angry that nobody else thinks you can do it will rekindle the excitement and passion phases in this stage... it will drive you home because you will use the anger to fuel you. If you are doubting yourself, and angry that you ever started... you will likely quit in this stage. Most people cannot get through it; but the ones who want it bad enough will. Frustration is in full force, exhaustion is peeking in the window and it may even be sitting on your couch with a soda by now. When you are exhausted, you get emotional... we will cry, punch a wall and blame everyone and everything simply because we don't want to admit our own failure.
LISTEN UP!!! You have only failed when you GIVE UP, if you die trying to succeed, you never truly failed. Use the anger to fuel you back into excitement and passion like never before or the road ends here for you. C'mon... do you even KNOW what awaits?

PASSION (the re-birthing phase)
HEY! You made it!  Congratulations! You allowed your fear, frustrations and anger to lead you back to me. Passion is stirring inside of you again and you won't stop now until you achieve the goal. THIS is where the magic happens. You have made it through the worst of times and have learned along the way how tough you truly are. It's time to plan again... leave the mistakes out and have patience. Trust that in time everything will happen exactly as you had planned. What other people say no longer matters, you are bulletproof. When you get knocked down, you won't stay down, you will jump up with a tear in your eye and keep running.

EXCITEMENT (the victory phase)
It was ALL worth it... I told you I would be back, and now I am more vibrant and meaningful than before. YOU DID IT! Your goal has been realized and the train is full speed ahead. You know the run, you know why you derailed and have fixed the issues so now you are running like the well oiled machine you were built to be. Enjoy this phase even more than last time... it is here to stay; it's also when the next goal is typically set.

Ready to go again???? I thought so!

Until next time... 

xoxo

Shells

Look for the full training on setting goals and achieving them during my 

weekend workshops  coming in fall 2015!

WWW.THESGIARDGROUP.COM

I HOPE THAT YOU WILL:

SHARE THIS POST

Follow me on Facebook

www.facebook.com/ShelleyD.Giard

www.facebook.com/theSGiardgroup

Follow me on Twitter

https://twitter.com/shelleygiard

WWW.SHELLEYGIARD.COM

WWW.SHELLEYGIARDMAKEUPARTISTRY.COM

  

IF YOU LIKE MY BLOGS, YOU WILL LOVE MY BOOK

To purchase a signed copy 

click here>> www.ineedthehappyending.com

 to read reviews and purchase it on Amazon

                                              

                                    click here>> http://amzn.to/1oki1qR 

Going After What You Hope For

Have you ever had a week when thoughts wrestled around in your head like leaves caught up in the wind and all you wished was for them to fall into place and settle in a neat little pile? That is how I would describe my week and on the eve of another Monday, I still have thoughts stirring around in the hurricane I call my brain. I feel a bit crazy at times; perhaps I am... and that is why there are people who simply don't "get" me. 

Nevertheless, this has certainly been a long and interesting week... thought provoking; and although I feel that something inside me has changed, I am not quite sure what it is yet.  I must admit that I had a few moments this week when I broke down emotionally... not because of sadness or defeat... but simply because of the moments that are expected as you take the kind of journey that I am on. A journey towards success in something is emotional, it can confuse you, and simply break you down. Essentially, if the goal is worth it, these moments are absolute; unavoidable. It is in these moments that most people quit... but since pushing through them has helped me reach every goal thus far, I will lay down tonight knowing that another achievement is on the horizon as I think about the tears that pooled in my eyes over the past few days.

I made a monumental decision this week and I am not sure yet how it feels... it's that out of my comfort zone kind of feeling when fear tries it's best to set in and then today at church, I was touched deeply by something that our guest speaker Tony Dungy said as he stood at the podium. I realize that I have another big decision to make. I will share these decisions with all of you once they process and I know what they will mean for my life but until then I ask that you keep me in your positive thoughts and prayers. Although I am hopeful, motivated, and strive to achieve all that I set goals for, I want you to know that I too struggle... I am human and that is what allows me to understand where you come from, where you are, where you want and don't want to be. 

As you start this week... I want you to say to yourself this simple phrase and KNOW that with it comes the power to overcome whatever comes your way.

"I am courageous, I am significant, I am fearless, I am faithful, I am strong...  I believe in myself because I KNOW that I can... I WILL and I MUST do what I am meant to do in order to be who I am meant to be. I am a fighter, I am a giver and I will be everything I aspire to be because I trust and have faith that I will."

xoxo

Shells

I HOPE THAT YOU WILL:

SHARE THIS POST

Follow me on Facebook

www.facebook.com/ShelleyD.Giard

Follow me on Twitter

https://twitter.com/shelleygiard

To purchase my book click here
www.ineedthehappyending.com 

 

How Do You Handle Failure?

This week was the first week that the kids went back to school after what seemed to be an EXTRA long vacation. With Thanksgiving and Christmas being so close together this year, it seemed like they were home for a month. As if that were not exhausting enough, I learned on the second day back, that my 12 year old's bus schedule changed and would be picking her up a half an hour earlier. That may not sound too bad until I disclose that her bus now comes at 5:25 a.m. instead of 5:55; meaning I have to get up at 4:30 now. So.... it has been QUITE the week for everyone.

Thursday was "one of those mornings". You know the kind of day that you perfectly planned out but then starts out different than you had anticipated? If you plan your days out like me, this often throw things off dramatically which can quickly lead to a snowball effect. Well, it was THAT kind of morning. Since I try to keep myself in mental check, I typically figure in wiggle room for mishaps... I have three kids, it's the inevitable, so it's necessary to figure in this time and yesterday was no exception. I was booked with a freelance job in Sarasota, which is about an hour and a half away and had planned my time out perfectly. I packed most of my things up the night before so that I would not forget anything but did leave a few things for the morning. NO problem. What I did NOT take in to account was how tired I was going to be due to 3 days of less sleep; I was moving a little slower.

 I was ready to go, the car was packed and I was off; tired but motivated for a great day. Soon after getting on the "expressway" traffic came to a stop... no end in sight and I had NO idea why. No exaggeration, it took me an hour to go about 15 miles. I sent the photographer a text along with a photo of the traffic jam and estimated my new arrival time. Luckily he was fine and just told me to be safe. In the end, a trip that should have taken me an hour and a half took me over 2 hours. If you know me, you KNOW that I HATE being late. If I am on time.. I am late, if I am late, SOMETHING MAJOR happened... (or perhaps my kids hid my keys.) I easily could have become irate, I could have let it ruin my day, but with more wisdom now than I had a few years ago, I REALLY set out to have a good day therefore could not let a traffic snafu set the bar for the rest of my afternoon. Not to mention that the model who hired me was a new client and showing up irritated would have made her uneasy, so I turned up my radio (music makes me happy) and sang loudly in my car while I patiently waited in gridlock.

Finally, as I approached the exit off the not-so "express" way onto the highway for my shoot, traffic cleared and it was smooth sailing. "COOL!" I thought... my new ETA was right on. I am driving... cruising and singing as I glance into my back seat realizing I had not done my mental check list for the items in the car, so I did it in the rear-view mirror. OH CRAP! I frantically searched for my hair styling case which holds my hair styling tools, flat iron, brushes, pins, curling wand styling products... IT WAS NOT THERE! Are you KIDDING? Too far into this trip now, I got angry at myself for a moment and then took a deep breath and said... you can do this... 22 years in; you got this. I kept driving and stayed positive when I truly wanted to scream, kick and punch myself. Seriously? You are THIS seasoned and you forgot your HAIR KIT? FAIL!

Long story longer, ( I am really good at that) I get to the studio, walk in with a smile on my face and said... "Well, I am an hour late AND I left my hair kit at home, but WE are going to ROCK this day so let's DO IT!" And well... we did. I managed to create the first look with minimal tools that the photographer happened to have and left for good 'ole CVS as soon as I got her wardrobe laid out for the first two sets. I bought a $17 bottle of hairspray that as an industry professional would typically only have to pay $7 for, a $40 Conair curling wand, bobby pins, ponytail holders and a hairbrush/comb set. I went back and banged out 5 more sets that afternoon and well... my day was awesome, I got a huge tip and the photos were amazing.

WBFF PRO 

Jill Diorio

Photo credits GW Burns

Now, the point of this LONG story is this....

Many people DON'T succeed because of their fears of failure. Many people FEEL like a failure when things don't go as planned. We beat ourselves up, get angry, resentful, frustrated and that gets us nowhere. In fact, you cannot think straight at all or problem solve when your mind is a wreck. Think about it... think of a time when something like this happened to you. How did you handle that failure? Did you fall apart and cave in or did you Face it, deal with it, and rock a solution? My hope is that by suffering through this long, drawn out story that you will face your next failure differently... and realize that it is an opportunity to shine; to show 'em what you got. When you can handle failure effectively, you realize the opportunity it brings and THAT small little twist in your thinking can change your life and your business. Now rock that failure and shine baby... shine bright!

xoxo

Shells

FEEL FREE TO:

SHARE THIS POST

SUBSCRIBE BY EMAIL

Follow me on Facebook

www.facebook.com/ShelleyD.Giard

Follow me on Twitter

https://twitter.com/shelleygiard

Oh.... What to Write... What to write?

Yep, It's another one of those nights where I know I have to do this but have NO idea what to write about. I have a mountainous pile of things on my mind. With it being a new year with new goals and because I am headed in a somewhat new direction, I find myself looking forward to finally adding a few people to my "enterprise" that will be growing with me. I have come to a point in my life where I must simplify in order to multiply. However I often wish God had limited the talents and passions he gave me to make this an easier task. I guess that's why he gave me an obsessive compulsive personality and ADHD... they have been as useful as they are annoying.

As I sit here typing still kind of blabbering... I hope I will keep your interest for longer than I feel I may with my randomness. People seem to really like my writing, and love to hear me speak; being told I had a "presence" more than once was not to be taken subtly. My blog and my book have been incredibly successful in their mission so far although I feel I have barely gotten started in the marketing process; I am truly in the baby steps in my mind and that's both exciting and scary. Yes... I get scared, I don't worry, but sometimes my fears cause me to procrastinate and over think. I have this need to have things "perfect" and well, I need to remember that there is perfection in the process of  tweaking imperfect things and that imperfect things still succeed; it is a process. My fear has always been that if things are not "perfectly ready" that they are simply not ready to be executed or delivered or created or whatever... it really depends on which of my businesses I am talking about. I have also allowed this need for perfection to keep me from getting outside help, thinking nobody would treat it like I will, that someone else won't give it 100% like me, so I have run myself ragged doing everything myself. If I continue this thinking, I will hold myself back from my dream of becoming a well known inspirational/motivational speaker... so I am setting that fear aside in 2014... it's time to move ONWARD and UPWARD.

I have experience in both my professional and personal life that CAN and WILL help people grow professionally and personally. My memoir has already helped so many people simply because so many walks of life can relate to my stories of struggle; for I have had several kinds and after 20 years of knowledge and experience of running multiple businesses, being the owner/ operator, the financial officer, the marketing director... what am I afraid of? For so long I have waited for someone else to take notice so that I would not have so much work to do... I wanted someone else to believe in me as much as I believe in me... it is something I have wanted all my life in the professional world and well, it feels impossible to attain. I did not want to have to learn things that I was uncomfortable learning in order to gain the knowledge I needed to run my own speaking engagements but a few weeks ago, something finally clicked... I CAN do this, I can't wait, because as my history plays... I know I can make this happen. I just need a few people who are willing to grow with me, to be patient and willing to put their passion into the awesome I know it can be and if they do I will be the most generous employer they have ever known. It truly is a big leap for me, but I WANT it,and I tend to get what I want if I am relentless in pursuing it. I know no obstacles...just the journey.

Is fear holding you back from something? Are you afraid to take that leap of faith? Are you too easily kept in the zone of comfort not knowing what people will say or think about you if you actually pursue your dreams? Are you financially where you want to be? Are you waking up every day dreading what you have to do or looking forward to it? Are you willing to do WHATEVER it takes to make your dreams come true?

I found myself in class this weekend... learning something that will help me help others as I pursue a speaking career. I dislike school, I dislike classrooms... unless I am teaching, but it was something that had to be done to complete my puzzle and I know I won't regret it once I pass the exam.

From youth, to adults, to people in the beauty professions... I am ready to inspire, motivate and educate in a BIGGER way. That's my #1 goal for 2014. Are you in?

One of my new branding images 

that I created on whim one day... it was just floating around in my crazy head.

xoxo

~Shells~ 

FEEL FREE TO:

SHARE THIS POST

SUBSCRIBE BY EMAIL

Follow me on Facebook

www.facebook.com/ShelleyD.Giard

Follow me on Twitter

https://twitter.com/shelleygiard