The Importance of Being Included

Tonight's blog was actually born from a thought that I had today regarding a few recent events that left me feeling kind of blegh. I don't feel this way often, but just as we all do... I have days when I just want to feel understood, like part of "the group."  I don't mean popularity, fame, or even getting a pat on the back. What I mean is just the feeling that what you do is noticed, understood and appreciated by the people that you want it from the most. Sure, I am blessed every single day with emails, letters, texts and friendly gestures from people, many who are strangers, that are inspired by my posts, my book, and my blogs. For that, I am so humbled and truly grateful. However once in a while, I still long for the feeling that I "fit in" to feel like I am part of something instead of that lone ranger, square peg, that I have always been reminded of being. At times we all battle with our emotions, our strengths, our weaknesses. When we allow ourselves to be vulnerable our minds travel to places some can never understand.

So as I decided on tonight's topic what I really wanted to do was just bang out a poem... like I used to when I had yucky days or great days that inspired the raw beauty of a simple poem; so here it goes totally unplanned....

I am barbaric, I am confident, I am raw and emotional,
I am fearful, I am brave, I am scared, I am heroic.

I am sad, I am happy, I am fulfilled, I am empty,
I am generous, I am selfish, I am busy, I am bored.

I am loving, I am committed, I am scattered, I am solid,
I am honest, I am open, I am strong, I am independent.

I am weak, I am lonely, I am satisfied, I am misunderstood.
I am passionate, I am friendly, I am silly, I am serious.

Wrapped up in a transparent piece of paper...
I am faithful, I am real; I am me.

S. Giard-

We all struggle with feelings of exclusion, at home, at our places of work, in groups of friends or colleagues; we notice the differences between "us" and "them" and once in while that feeling makes even the most confident people feel uncomfortable. If this is something that you can relate to, know that you are not weak, you are not weird and you shouldn't even care in the grand scheme; but it is hard sometimes as we all still understand the importance of feeling included and  know how wonderful it feels when we are accepted and understood for who we are.

xoxo

Shells

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Finding the Strength to Forgive Yourself

Yes... it's Sunday.... not Friday when I typically post my thought provoking blog, but as you know, when I skip a day that means it's been a what?... Yep, a busy week. SO two days late always means I will make it up to you with an extra special message and you will still get the Monday blog to start off your week off on a positive note.

I was initially going to write Friday's blog about difficulty in relationships, (it is still on my list) but after speaking at my church last night to two groups of middle school kids, I was really inspired to share a similar message; an "extra special" message with you that I felt some of you may need to hear.

Faithful or not... it is often hard to forgive others for sadness, hurt or disappointment that they have caused. However, an even harder thing to do is to forgive ourselves. We do things that we know are not an example of who we truly are, we give in to things that we end up feeling bad about later and beat ourselves up, holding onto the guilt that goes with it for a very long time. Maybe you said something or did something to someone you care about in the heat of anger, disappointment or frustration that you knew in afterthought was the wrong thing to do or say. Maybe there are things in your past that you are ashamed of; things that only you know and that you would never openly admit to the people around you today. Maybe there is a family member that continuously does things that destroys their integrity or that flaws their relationship with you, but because they are family you simply have to deal with it and you feel guilty for having this "secret"  feeling of animosity towards them.

Regardless of what scenario you can plug yourself into as you read, I want you to know that forgiving yourself is the only way to start the process of healing from the pain, the sadness, and guilt that you carry with you every day and is simply the KEY to moving on. You should realize that we all make mistakes, nobody is perfect; this is most certainly an imperfect world full of imperfect people. Who are we to judge someone for their mistakes or shortcoming or choices when we have so many of our own?

I remember a time in my life when I was very lost, alone and empty inside. I always blamed others for the negative things that had and continued to happen to me. I refused to own up and admit that it was ME who was wrong... that it was ME who made the choices that got me to where I was in life. However, something happened to me inside in a very specific moment of my life and after many years of playing the blame game and spewing that a "God" that I did not even believe in at the time must hate me, I finally owned up and admitted that it was indeed MY fault, that it was ME who made the wrong choices, did the wrong things; and that began my healing process. It was an incredibly pivotal moment in my life. I not only started to forgive myself, but I finally believed that I was worthy of forgiveness from others.

It was so freeing to begin truly forgiving the people who had hurt me... weight of a thousand mountains lifted off of my shoulders and it was then that I started feeling comfortable sharing the truth about who I really was, the truth about the wrongs I had done and I felt that my stories could help others find this freedom I now had. My shame was gone, I was no longer carrying guilt and it felt amazing. I began to apologize to people I had hurt, and still do this today when I slip up; for I am an imperfect person; we all are, and I too allow situations to get the best of me sometimes.

As I spoke to these young kids last night, I was specifically talking about God's forgiveness, and there was a point in my talk where I stated that when true Christians ask for His forgiveness, it is given to us immediately... without hesitation and stated that parents take longer to forgive us than God. I told them that we are all worthy of forgiveness... acceptance, and that we should realize the people around us are as well. I told them that no matter what they have done or what they will do in the many years ahead, that if they keep faith in their heart they never have to worry about carrying the weight of guilt or shame, that if God had forgiven me after all that I had done which included turning away from faith all together, that he would forgive them too. As I watched their innocent young eyes tear up, I knew I had hit home with many of them; it was an incredible feeling.

For any of you reading... faithful or not, forgiving is the act of letting go... it does not mean that we have to forget what happened and it does not mean we have to continue or rekindle a relationship with someone who hurts us... it is simply the act of freeing OURSELVES from the weight and burden that lies on our shoulders and affects us every single day when we hang on to the pain and it also frees the guilt the other person may hold. Forgiveness is the only way to heal from what has happened and it allows us to embrace what we were meant to be... it helps us realize our purpose in life and it is the absolute way to reach all you ever dream of.

If you recall, I mentioned in a recent blog that I had found and contacted the man who was drinking and driving the vehicle that killed my sister 31 years ago. We have continued to send emails back and forth, he has shared his memories of that night with me and when I told him that I forgave him, he told me that my forgiveness was the most amazing gift anyone could have ever given him. Being able to forgive him was also a gift to me, but without me taking that step neither of those gifts would have been received nor would I have the connection to a past full of questions that I now have answers to.

As I close today's post... these are my final thoughts...

How many things are you holding on to that affect you in a negative way?
How many people have you failed to forgive?
Have you forgiven yourself for your own failures and disappointments?

Claim yourself worthy! Forgive yourself, forgive others... and my promise is that you WILL live a happier life.

xoxo

Shells

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The Value of NOT Fitting In

I remember years ago how badly I wanted to "fit in,  it was my goal to have everyone like me, to have tons of friends and was willing to do almost anything to gain that acceptance. Unfortunately, for many years I had a hard time. Once I moved away from my home town into a new state, social acceptance from classmates and those around me was not something that I really had, and no matter how hard I tried, popularity never really happened for me. At that time in my life, the feeling of exclusion was devastating; we all want to gain some form of "popularity" in a sense, even when we are older; it's quite normal actually. However after years of being thought of as weird and growing up without always having that acceptance taught me a lot ...all of it was valuable, but the most valuable moment was when I got tired of pretending and just decided to be myself. Always trying to act a certain way in order to cater to the crowd I was around was exhausting and never felt right. I started reading books that helped me gain a true understanding of who I really was and why I was not always accepted. I was never someone who conformed, I had strong opinions and passions and felt the need to be honest and forthcoming about them ; I was a rebel of sorts and this trait often scared people. I have always been assertive and direct but have a heart of gold that many people never saw through my strong outer shell.

Along the way, trying to gain acceptance actually caused me to lose who I really was, and it wasn't until I "found" myself again that I really began to grow. I learned that I wasn't typical, I was not one of the Jones's; I never would be and that there was SO much more to life than fitting in. In fact, my life of NOT fitting in became the one I fell in love with; life truly began when I realized these things. I started to embrace who I was... for me... and it felt right; it felt good, it was natural and less stressful. I no longer worried about what people thought of me and realized that the people who came into my life and stuck were there because of who I really was, not for who I was pretending to be. My friendships from that day on... and even now, are genuine, they are real, everlasting and ironically I have more friends now than I can truly handle. I have shoulders to cry on, hands to hold and ears that will listen when I need them... I am the same for them.

If you can relate to what I have been saying and you are still trying to fit in, if you are still trying to figure out who it is you are supposed to be in order to gain that "honorary social acceptance" I encourage you to stop... find who YOU are again, THAT is who you should be. Get back in touch with the person you are inside, the person that makes YOU tick, and be proud of who that is. I promise you that you will attract the right kind of people.You will develop stronger, more meaningful relationships and your life will be SO much happier. When you LOVE you for YOU and not who people expect or want you to be, life does not stop... it thrives.

Love you all, thanks for reading

xoxo

~Shells~

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Reaching Your Ultimate Goal

The hardest thing about tonight's blog is where to begin. As many of you know, I am always setting goals for myself; some may seem a bit odd or unusual to the people around me because they do not understand how, why or what my reasoning is. Although I do tell a lot, I typically do not tell the whole story until my plan is mapped out in enough detail for you to connect the dots. I mean... it's all in MY head how it all goes together but to the average person it seems that I am all over the place.

Recently, I have been posting some teasers on Facebook and even vaguely sprinkling things through my blogs for marketing purposes as well as to share bits of my journey and thought processes with you. It's called creating "buzz". I guess it has worked, because I have been getting emails and messages asking why and what I am doing things for... people are confused as to my direction. So.... although I cannot tell all at this point, I will let you a little more than I have so that you can understand a little better.

(Knuckle crack)

Okay.... taking you back to my teen years, I had been bullied and teased relentlessly for years and despite how sad it made me, I allowed it to fuel me. The very acts that were meant to stop me gave me the drive to succeed. (perhaps to the um-teenth degree) The desire to MAKE IT HAPPEN was birthed and has never gone away and has actually seemingly become stronger. When I became a hairdresser 23 years ago, I did it so that I could make people feel good about themselves, so that I could "help them". When I dove head first into owning my own salon I connected the dot to becoming a business person and entrepreneur. A few years later, when I became an educator... I connected yet another dot. Becoming a busy makeup artist was yet another, and becoming an author and speaker is quickly becoming the most relevant dot in my picture. Every step became more and more about helping others making them feel good... worthy and relevant. Each time I added something to my resume, I pushed my career a step further.


As life went on, more and more knowledge was acquired through my experiences and by me seeking it out. I read only non-fiction, self-reflective books, memoirs and psychology magazine articles while others watched TV. Google became my best friend as I dove into psychology, health and wellness, personal and business finance, and information about building a secure financial future. I soaked up so much information I could hardly sleep most nights, but I LOVED it!

At the time, I was not sure what was happening inside of me or why for that matter, I just knew I was having the time of my life learning everything I could; stretching and challenging the capacity of my mind. You see, when I was in school, a lot of my time was spent worrying who did and didn't like me, I was lost for many years in a fog after my sister was killed, so I missed out on a lot of the glory of using my brain and realizing what it was capable of; in fact I barely passed most subjects and even wanted to quit school at times.As an adult, I have become a COMPLETE nerd and I love it. At times I feel like a walking encyclopedia but it's useful in conversations and makes for great stories.

When I turned 40 in December, I found my "List of Goals" that I made my senior year of high school. I was one of those kids who had dreams and goals at a very young age. I became happy as I skimmed it because I had reached every "lifetime" goal in some capacity that I had set for myself despite all of the adversity that was tossed in my path. There was one goal; my "ultimate" goal that I had not yet reached to it's fullest potential in my mind and that was the goal of becoming an inspirational/ motivational speaker. Sure... I have speaking experience, I was an educator in my field of hair for 7 years and have went on to speak in schools and have created a platform as an inspirational/motivational author and blogger over the past two years. However doing this has made me realize how much I absolutely love it, what a passion I have for it, and how I want to build on it.

All of the things I am doing... taking courses, passing exams, getting special licenses and everything that may seem disconnected is ABSOLUTELY connected. Worry not, I am not changing my profession, I am not quitting anything... I am just taking all that I am doing to another level; an exponential one.I have set new goals, ones that I never envisioned. I am DOING what I have to do to be all that I can be in what I love and if that means looking a bit off my rocker to some of you, then so be it. I have a process of doing things and although it make no sense to you, it makes perfect sense to me. (if only you could see my outlines)

There is an art to creating your "Happy Ending" it does not happen with a kiss or a flick of a wand like it does in fairy tales. There is no "Prince, Princess or Fairy Godmother" who will show up and create it for you, YOU are what creates it. You must MAKE it happen. It will never fall into your lap. And well, if you can learn that from following me then my mission is accomplished.

Love you all, thanks for reading

xoxo

~Shells~

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How Do You Handle Failure?

This week was the first week that the kids went back to school after what seemed to be an EXTRA long vacation. With Thanksgiving and Christmas being so close together this year, it seemed like they were home for a month. As if that were not exhausting enough, I learned on the second day back, that my 12 year old's bus schedule changed and would be picking her up a half an hour earlier. That may not sound too bad until I disclose that her bus now comes at 5:25 a.m. instead of 5:55; meaning I have to get up at 4:30 now. So.... it has been QUITE the week for everyone.

Thursday was "one of those mornings". You know the kind of day that you perfectly planned out but then starts out different than you had anticipated? If you plan your days out like me, this often throw things off dramatically which can quickly lead to a snowball effect. Well, it was THAT kind of morning. Since I try to keep myself in mental check, I typically figure in wiggle room for mishaps... I have three kids, it's the inevitable, so it's necessary to figure in this time and yesterday was no exception. I was booked with a freelance job in Sarasota, which is about an hour and a half away and had planned my time out perfectly. I packed most of my things up the night before so that I would not forget anything but did leave a few things for the morning. NO problem. What I did NOT take in to account was how tired I was going to be due to 3 days of less sleep; I was moving a little slower.

 I was ready to go, the car was packed and I was off; tired but motivated for a great day. Soon after getting on the "expressway" traffic came to a stop... no end in sight and I had NO idea why. No exaggeration, it took me an hour to go about 15 miles. I sent the photographer a text along with a photo of the traffic jam and estimated my new arrival time. Luckily he was fine and just told me to be safe. In the end, a trip that should have taken me an hour and a half took me over 2 hours. If you know me, you KNOW that I HATE being late. If I am on time.. I am late, if I am late, SOMETHING MAJOR happened... (or perhaps my kids hid my keys.) I easily could have become irate, I could have let it ruin my day, but with more wisdom now than I had a few years ago, I REALLY set out to have a good day therefore could not let a traffic snafu set the bar for the rest of my afternoon. Not to mention that the model who hired me was a new client and showing up irritated would have made her uneasy, so I turned up my radio (music makes me happy) and sang loudly in my car while I patiently waited in gridlock.

Finally, as I approached the exit off the not-so "express" way onto the highway for my shoot, traffic cleared and it was smooth sailing. "COOL!" I thought... my new ETA was right on. I am driving... cruising and singing as I glance into my back seat realizing I had not done my mental check list for the items in the car, so I did it in the rear-view mirror. OH CRAP! I frantically searched for my hair styling case which holds my hair styling tools, flat iron, brushes, pins, curling wand styling products... IT WAS NOT THERE! Are you KIDDING? Too far into this trip now, I got angry at myself for a moment and then took a deep breath and said... you can do this... 22 years in; you got this. I kept driving and stayed positive when I truly wanted to scream, kick and punch myself. Seriously? You are THIS seasoned and you forgot your HAIR KIT? FAIL!

Long story longer, ( I am really good at that) I get to the studio, walk in with a smile on my face and said... "Well, I am an hour late AND I left my hair kit at home, but WE are going to ROCK this day so let's DO IT!" And well... we did. I managed to create the first look with minimal tools that the photographer happened to have and left for good 'ole CVS as soon as I got her wardrobe laid out for the first two sets. I bought a $17 bottle of hairspray that as an industry professional would typically only have to pay $7 for, a $40 Conair curling wand, bobby pins, ponytail holders and a hairbrush/comb set. I went back and banged out 5 more sets that afternoon and well... my day was awesome, I got a huge tip and the photos were amazing.

WBFF PRO 

Jill Diorio

Photo credits GW Burns

Now, the point of this LONG story is this....

Many people DON'T succeed because of their fears of failure. Many people FEEL like a failure when things don't go as planned. We beat ourselves up, get angry, resentful, frustrated and that gets us nowhere. In fact, you cannot think straight at all or problem solve when your mind is a wreck. Think about it... think of a time when something like this happened to you. How did you handle that failure? Did you fall apart and cave in or did you Face it, deal with it, and rock a solution? My hope is that by suffering through this long, drawn out story that you will face your next failure differently... and realize that it is an opportunity to shine; to show 'em what you got. When you can handle failure effectively, you realize the opportunity it brings and THAT small little twist in your thinking can change your life and your business. Now rock that failure and shine baby... shine bright!

xoxo

Shells

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Oh.... What to Write... What to write?

Yep, It's another one of those nights where I know I have to do this but have NO idea what to write about. I have a mountainous pile of things on my mind. With it being a new year with new goals and because I am headed in a somewhat new direction, I find myself looking forward to finally adding a few people to my "enterprise" that will be growing with me. I have come to a point in my life where I must simplify in order to multiply. However I often wish God had limited the talents and passions he gave me to make this an easier task. I guess that's why he gave me an obsessive compulsive personality and ADHD... they have been as useful as they are annoying.

As I sit here typing still kind of blabbering... I hope I will keep your interest for longer than I feel I may with my randomness. People seem to really like my writing, and love to hear me speak; being told I had a "presence" more than once was not to be taken subtly. My blog and my book have been incredibly successful in their mission so far although I feel I have barely gotten started in the marketing process; I am truly in the baby steps in my mind and that's both exciting and scary. Yes... I get scared, I don't worry, but sometimes my fears cause me to procrastinate and over think. I have this need to have things "perfect" and well, I need to remember that there is perfection in the process of  tweaking imperfect things and that imperfect things still succeed; it is a process. My fear has always been that if things are not "perfectly ready" that they are simply not ready to be executed or delivered or created or whatever... it really depends on which of my businesses I am talking about. I have also allowed this need for perfection to keep me from getting outside help, thinking nobody would treat it like I will, that someone else won't give it 100% like me, so I have run myself ragged doing everything myself. If I continue this thinking, I will hold myself back from my dream of becoming a well known inspirational/motivational speaker... so I am setting that fear aside in 2014... it's time to move ONWARD and UPWARD.

I have experience in both my professional and personal life that CAN and WILL help people grow professionally and personally. My memoir has already helped so many people simply because so many walks of life can relate to my stories of struggle; for I have had several kinds and after 20 years of knowledge and experience of running multiple businesses, being the owner/ operator, the financial officer, the marketing director... what am I afraid of? For so long I have waited for someone else to take notice so that I would not have so much work to do... I wanted someone else to believe in me as much as I believe in me... it is something I have wanted all my life in the professional world and well, it feels impossible to attain. I did not want to have to learn things that I was uncomfortable learning in order to gain the knowledge I needed to run my own speaking engagements but a few weeks ago, something finally clicked... I CAN do this, I can't wait, because as my history plays... I know I can make this happen. I just need a few people who are willing to grow with me, to be patient and willing to put their passion into the awesome I know it can be and if they do I will be the most generous employer they have ever known. It truly is a big leap for me, but I WANT it,and I tend to get what I want if I am relentless in pursuing it. I know no obstacles...just the journey.

Is fear holding you back from something? Are you afraid to take that leap of faith? Are you too easily kept in the zone of comfort not knowing what people will say or think about you if you actually pursue your dreams? Are you financially where you want to be? Are you waking up every day dreading what you have to do or looking forward to it? Are you willing to do WHATEVER it takes to make your dreams come true?

I found myself in class this weekend... learning something that will help me help others as I pursue a speaking career. I dislike school, I dislike classrooms... unless I am teaching, but it was something that had to be done to complete my puzzle and I know I won't regret it once I pass the exam.

From youth, to adults, to people in the beauty professions... I am ready to inspire, motivate and educate in a BIGGER way. That's my #1 goal for 2014. Are you in?

One of my new branding images 

that I created on whim one day... it was just floating around in my crazy head.

xoxo

~Shells~ 

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Talk to Yourself Much?

Well of COURSE you do, and so do I. We may not want to admit it and some people may find it strange, but we ALL talk to ourselves. In fact, often the WAY we talk to ourselves is what sets our direction for the day, and ultimately our lives. How many times have you woken up saying "Ugh, I don't want to wake up today" or "Today is an awful day" How about, "I hate when.... or I get so annoyed when..." or "I hate the way I look in this" Yep, we set our mood and our thoughts by the way we talk to ourselves. Are you conscious of what you say? What kind of stuff do you share on social media? Are you careful what frame of mind you allow yourself to enter as you start and end your day? How about the image you project of the kind of person you are when talking to others? In other words, what is that mouth of yours spewing?

Have you ever heard that verbal abuse is worse than physical abuse? Well, it's true and this counts when we talk to ourselves just as much if not more. I am the first to say that when someone else is verbally abusive it can mess you up for years, but if you are abusive to yourself, it can wreck you for LIFE. When I am around negative people these days, I find it very hard to keep my lips sealed. When almost every word that escapes their lips is negative... "I hate...", "I can't stand it when..." "If one more person does this or that...", "I can't wait for this day to be over..." "I can't take it", " I hate the way I look", "I am broke" and the list in infinite. I seriously want to whip out a ruler and slap them...no joke, but I am not the violent type (unless you mess with my friends or my family then I may actually go ape.) I have been known however to stop them in mid sentence and say"tell me something you love!" JUST to jolt their mind a bit and hopefully bring them back to reality or at least to a tolerable state. The key here is that if you constantly say all these things to yourself and those around you constantly you get stuck in a frame of mind.

One of the hardest things to do sometimes is to stay positive, trust me, I speak from experience. However if you stay negative.. you will STAY negative and will be swallowed whole by a big bunch of... well CRAP. It will affect your health, your job, and your relationships negatively, it's toxic to everything around you as WELL as you. Although tonight's blog is somewhat short... it has a HUGE message.

STOP ABUSING YOURSELF WITH SELF TALK! 

Start praising yourself, pat yourself on the back, look and the mirror and see beyond the reflection that you may not like and into the eyes of the person you are inside, and if you don't like who that is... then YOU are in control of that. The first thing I would suggest is to keep reading my blog... I don't capitalize off of it, no money is made but the wealth within the words that I write are priceless.

Goodnight, have a great weekend and talk NICE to yourself; sometimes YOU are your only cheerleader.

xoxo

~Shells~ 

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A New Way to Look at the New Year

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!!

I wanted to write something different today... not the normal New Year's blog that typically talks about the resolutions and goals you have for the new year. I wanted to pose a different look on a tradition that occurs every year and gets everyone buzzing about how much better this year it is going to be. So... for a change I am going to have you look at things from the not so green side of the fence, I am going to get you thinking about what you have done or not done up until now that keeps you from sticking with those resolutions or achieving your goals.

Although I am happy to see people setting goals and proclaiming resolutions, I am always sad as I watch them year after year fail to meet or stick with their initial hopes and dreams. I do not enjoy watching people get sidetracked by the things that surround them and allowing those things to suffocate every wish and hope they had only to stand in wonder in the end saying "why?". I am an observer... perhaps not the quiet kind, but an observer nonetheless and I watch people lose sight of their dreams and goals every day. I started blogging to fuel the passion I have for reaching your goals, I wrote a book to give others hope that they can do anything they want if they stick with it no matter what gets in your way, and as this new year awaits I will be sharing all of these things in a much bigger way through seminars and speaking engagements. I continue to learn and be trained in things that will help me help others and I have never been so excited and fueled in my entire life than I am right now.

Are you happy? Are you fulfilled? Are you where you want to be in life with your career, your finances, your spirituality, physical and internal health and emotional state of mind? If so... that's awesome, you are doing things right. If you could not answer yes to all of those questions, are you ready to be focused? Are you READY to make things happen instead of allowing things to "happen" to you?

Okay.. cool. So, what I want you to do is to sit down and BE REAL with yourself. 

Make two columns on a sheet of paper. 

In the first column, I want you to write down things that you KNOW keep you from creating the life that you want... yep, make that list of "ugly realities" that will stare you right in the face and make you feel shameful. It's reality, and well, reality has to hurt sometimes in order to wake us up. We are so quick to blame our lack of happiness on circumstances or on things but with a LOT of negative "things" and crappy "circumstances" in my own life, I am qualified to say that it's not the circumstances that stop you. It's YOU that stops you. Fear, lack of faith in yourself, worry about what others may think, THAT is what stops you. It's watching television when you should be planning or learning, it's wasting money on things that will satisfy you right now instead of making that money play a role in where you want to be down the road. The steps to success are not complicated, theoretically they are simple... but simple is not always easy is it? Nope. And neither is the discipline it takes, but I promise the reward and feelings of accomplishment are well worth it. Choices are what keep us from it and also what will lead us to it; and those choices are yours!

After you write down the things that you do that keep you from achieving your goals... I want you to write in the other column the things that you want to attain or accomplish. Maybe it's a happier marriage, a more fulfilling job, financial stability, better health, a baby, a business, a home, a new car; list everything that you want. After you are done with both lists, look at them and draw a line from the things you do that hold you back to the want the they are keeping you from having. 

If your WANTS are stronger than the needs for the things that hold you back, then you are on well your way to having everything you want in life. If you cannot give up that Starbucks coffee in order to save for a car, then you have some work to do. Either way, when you have on paper in front of you WHAT is keeping you from being happier it clarifies that big picture. It is much easier to see the changes you must make when you know what is truly holding you back; sometimes those realities are really hard to swallow. 

Love what you have... always be thankful for every little thing; but if you want more, it is there for the taking. Lay all the fear, worry and doubt aside and be real and believe in yourself. If you are a faithful person, lay all the fear, worry, and doubt at the feet of God and trust in what He can do in your life if you just lean on Him. It's simple...

NOW...LET'S DO THIS! 

Make 2014 the year that WILL be better because YOU COMMITTED to make it that way!


VISUALIZE to MAXIMIZE and soon it will MATERIALIZE. 


~Shelley Giard~

XOXO

~Shells~

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