Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Finding Balance...

Do you ever have ah-ha moments? The kind that make you feel like Wile E.Coyote when the anvil inevitably falls? Yeah... well I have them all of the time, and frankly I am not sure that it's typical or for that matter normal. I have the feeling that I encounter them often simply because I strive to learn about how to become a better partner, a better mother and a better friend... (I couldn't dodge the anvils if I boycotted ACME forever!) We are promised a better life if we do this. I had one of these moments over the weekend and decided that if I shared it with my readers, it could likely help someone.

If you have been reading my blogs then you know that I have been crazy busy lately... (not complaining at all about that!) I have been busy with work, work and more work, which is AWESOME! Something I could not figure out however, was why I was beginning to feel stressed. Usually when I am SLAMMED with work I am happy knowing that money is coming in, (that typically creates less stress for a work-a-holic /business addict such as myself) Relax? What is that? Take time for yourself? That's a foreign statement, have unscheduled fun? Never knew what that was! For the past decade or longer, I was not living life... or at least not the way it was intended. I was nose to the grindstone, gotta make a living to support your family and have nice things no matter what kind of person. Something shifted though... something happened to me when I hit rock bottom...and that was that I was forced to relax, and for the first time I came to experience things I never took the time to appreciate before.

Many, many things have changed since I had this shift in who I was two years ago. I opened my heart up again after a very long and tough relationship, I spent more time with my kids and less time away from them; I became a better mother, friend and partner. I found time to do everything I needed to do but MADE the time to also do what I WANTED. Of course... I had to make financial sacrifices in order to do this, and I must say that not only did it humble me, it made me more appreciative. Finding that balance... having just enough work, a little more fun and a lot more family and friends.  It leads to happiness; no wonder the "Cleaver's" had it made! (if you don't know who they are then Google them! (And don't call me old after you do!)

For years people have found themsleves so busy trying to drive that fancy car, build that custom house, and wear expensive labels that they forget to find that balance... I was one of those people once upon a time, and I never knew what I was missing. Now... as I have been swamped with work and feeling stressed I realize that my happiness had been depleted because my balance was interrupted. I suppose I have gotten used to having time for everything that having no time to do laundry, paint some walls in the new house and cook dinner for my family was making Shelley a grumpy scrooge! Ba-Humbug!

My latest ah-ha moment was over the weekend when I finally had some time to finish up some home projects, catch up on laundry and cook dinner for family and guests we had over on Sunday. My poopy mood seemed to dissolve because I regained that balance and in return, my "happy" came back. It's really hard to admit that I am growing up... my wisdom is scaring me and I am pretty sure I will soon sound like my Pépère who was as old and wise as they come. He had lots of experiences too (called trial and error)... so I suppose I took after him in that sense. (loved that man)

I encourage you to look at your life and ask yourself if you are "happy".  Analyze how well your "balance" is. If you are out of whack and want to change things, begin prioritizing by figuring out what is REALLY important to YOU in life; not what is important to others. That may sound selfish... and it is on one hand; however on another hand it's exactly what you need to sort out in order to be happy and succeed in life. The cool part is that it will make everyone around you happier as well.  That's the best kind of selfish there is!

I DARE you to find balance... 
Find the time to do all that you need to and most of what you want to. It's priceless, I promise! 

"Sometimes hitting rock bottom will take you straight to the top." Shelley Giard©2012