Thursday, June 14, 2012

Self-Discovery Tip: Don't Explode! Get it OUT!

Well... not everyday can be butterflies and rainbows right? Although I tend to make the best out of every day... today I had a hard time mentally. I love the Internet... I love having everything at my fingertips right when I need it and being able to communicate with people all over the country in real time is so amazing to me. I love the convenience of shopping from home given the fact that my schedule is so hectic and carting my three kids around from store to store in and out of car seats in 98 degree weather is not my idea of fun. It is SO worth spending the extra few bucks for the shipping. Unfortunately there is always a dark side of things. I tend never to look at that side being that my daily intent is to stay positive; but sometimes, it just has to creep up on you and get your attention. Today was one of those days. I was a victim of hacking or identity theft, fraud, whatever you want to call it, they all mean the same to me. Someone in Canada had a field day with my debit card and charged $1000 worth of merchandise at Bed Bath and Beyond. Now, I have to prove it wasn't me even though the way I found out was a phone call from the fraud department at my bank. Hmm... sounds a bit backwards. You call me because you suspect fraud and now I have to fill out a form and fax it to you so you can "investigate" before you credit back the $1000?.... LOVELY. Meanwhile this is my business account that has been frozen. I swear I need to go back to keeping my money in a shoe box. Lets hope they don't take the entire 5 days they allow themselves to credit the money back to my account , I wonder if the stock market will rise between now and then?

Onto other things... it's time to get into self-help-mode and out of pity party mode because someone got happy with my debit card.

I have met many people in my 21 year career as a stylist. I may as well have been puffing a pipe, notepad in hand nodding my head as I flipped foils and slung color. In that 21 years, I have gotten really good at psychology and the energy of the human mind. I read people very well; I watch their every twitch, every foot tap, hand movement, lip nibble, every swallow and pulsing Adam's apple and of course let's not forget the pinball eyes. I can tell when someone is  lying, and I can tell when someone is upset, sad, mad, frustrated you name it, it's part of my job; reading people. I have heard stories... many of them. The most difficult ones I hear are the stories people tell when they are harboring feelings. Maybe it's a friend or a family member that has upset them, a boss, a co-worker... and the emotions poor out and runneth over the sides of my Hydraulic chair. Bitterness & anger are always the prominent emotions that come out. I always relate to these stories very well because I used to harbor feelings too. I never said what I felt, if someone would ask me what was wrong I would say nothing as I burst inside wanting to scream. I became bitter and developed animosity and resentment towards the people who had hurt my feelings. The problem was, THEY never knew they did... or at least some of them didn't. Why? Because I NEVER said anything! I held it all in and eventually the toxic emotions came bubbling out onto people around me that did not deserve it about things completely unrelated to what was REALLY going on.

It wasn't until I went to a seminar and heard Shad Helmstetter speak that I realized that I could re-program my "hard drive." For years and years and years I had experienced mental abuse. From getting bullied in my adolescent years to two failed marriages...I had a lot on my mental "hard drive" that needed to be re-written. That day changed my life.. what he said changed my life and I began to heal. Harboring feelings does nothing but junk up your "hard drive" it is a Trojan virus that needs to be deleted.  Too may of these "viruses" will shut you down. ( I hope you are getting the metaphorical speak) We must re-write our data, we must fill our head with positive things and forgive ourselves and others for mistakes that have affected us. It is only then that you can truly begin to feel free of what once was and start living what's now.

Don't harbor feelings... feelings of guilt, anger, sadness, get it out... TALK about it. That is the first step to finding happiness and peace in your life.

This post is dedicated to one of my BEST friends. I love you.. and if you are reading you KNOW who you are. I want nothing more in life than your happiness.... Begin rewriting your hard drive today. <3