Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Don't Hate Me Because I am Blunt...

~~This blog post was inspired by my own Facebook quote this morning~~ 
"Don't hate me because I am blunt; love me because I am honest" ©SGiard2012

Tonight... I decided to write about being blunt and honest; how the two coincide in my brain and why this is of critical importance in my world. If you have not read last night's blog prior to reading this one you may need to click here  http://shelleygiard.blogspot.com/2012/02/hey-control-freak-i-pronounce-you-out.html  and read it so the beginning of this post will make sense to you.

Last night my blog had a very blunt tone... an honest tone, a passionate tone, all of which are a part of who I am. The majority of my posts have that warm-fuzzy, inspirational feelingS with a dash of humor and a pinch of goofiness... after all that is also who I am. A positive, uplifting, optimistic, silly, goofy person who does everything she can to wake up and make the day awesome despite the falling buildings that often crowd my path to success and the occasional obstacle course that resembles the Amazon Forest. It's life...  it was not promised to ever be easy; and nothing that is worth it is. Is laboring a child easy? (If you say yes, then you are either a man who has no right to an opinion on this topic or a woman who has not experienced the true valor of natural childbirth... I have; trust me, it's no pony ride!) Marriage is not easy, friendships are not easy... making a cake from scratch is not "easy" but the end result of birth, a long lasting marriage, and the yummy goodness of a cake made from scratch are all worth the hassle, pain, and confusion. Life is no different. It's not rainbows and cotton candy and I have never pretended it is.

I am blunt... to a fault maybe; some can handle it, some cannot, and I am okay with that. Before you assume anything, I did not get hate mail or negative comments to give me the feeling I needed to explain myself. I just wanted to write about honesty and how being blunt is often the same thing in a less tailored suit and why I find it effective when trying to prove a point that I am passionate about. Have you ever been to see a motivational speaker? They don't candy coat anything, it's why I LOVE going to see them. They are true, honest, no holding back kind of people and that is what puts me in forward motion. (and also why I think I would make a good one) They put things out there, in your face to help you realize the point of their speech, what you are doing wrong or what you could do better to change your situation. It is a psychological way to get into people's heads what they need to hear in order to MAKE that change. My blog last night was fueled by my own experience however, I was trying to enlighten my readers (just in case they did not know) that divorce CAN be a negative turned positive, and how being stupid and seeking revenge or being spiteful prolongs the agony for everyone involved ESPECIALLY children. My mission is to help people find the tap when the glass is half empty in hopes of helping them live happier lives. I don't think this is a bad thing and if you do, I suppose you are reading the wrong blog. 

What kind of friend would you want with you at a rib eating contest? The kind of friend who would let you walk around with barbecue pork stuck between your teeth, or the person who would say "hey you need a toothpick, you have pork between your teeth." (I have no idea where that analogy came from by the way... that was totally weird) Anyway, my point is that I am the friend that would give you a toothpick; find you a toothpick or say open up and pick it out with my finger. It may be embarrassing for a minute or two but it would be mortifying to know you spoke to fifteen people (and that cute guy or girl) with pork in your teeth right? Okay... time to move on, I hope you get my point, and just for the record I have never been to nor cared to go to a rib eating contest. (creative writing at it's best) HAHA! 

I hope that you think about this a little, think of how you are... do you candy coat things giving the people around you false hope? Are you the kind that teaches your kids that everyone wins? If so, I suggest you stop and think about that rib eating contest and be the person that YOU would want to be with. Don't encourage when you should discourage.  I will give you an example of this to end my post, and I am off to bed for the night. 

I talk about self esteem and false esteem a lot... false esteem is built by candy coating. My daughter Baleigh loves to sing, she is a bit tone deaf without music playing, and although most songs sound off key, I encourage her to have fun singing but let her know that certain songs are not for her. The other day she came into the kitchen LOUDLY singing Adele, I had to ask her to stop and said "I love that song, but it's really a tough one to sing why don't you sing another one instead" See? I did not have to send her away in tears... and make her feel like a failure by telling her she sounded bad... I was blunt and honest, and it worked. By being honest I encouraged her to sing a better song choice and my ears thanked me.

Moral to this story?
BE HONEST ~ BE BLUNT, It's a better way to be!
 I took this picture in Las Vegas last year... 
it may be a bit inappropriate but part of me felt he would be a good friend to have.

xoxo 
~Shells~